September 1st I declared we were moving out of survival mode into living mode. Since Paceler was born we have simply been trying to survive. Doing our very best to make it through each hectic, crazy, sleepless day all in one piece. I felt us fall into a bubble, too tired to think yet alone enjoy life. These past few weeks it has really hit me, made me sad and frustrated that a precious, adorable nine and a half month old child has ruled our life. Pace is such a blessing, totally God's timing and plan and for that we are forever grateful. But and I say BUT loudly, life has changed, my marriage has changed, my schedule has changed, my focus has changed, my enthusiasm has changed, everything. Change is outstanding, I love it and fully wanted life to change with kids but we were given two, not one but two, children who hate sleep. They don't know how, aren't good at it and really just despise it all together. This factor alone pushed us into pure and utter survival mode. Many said having a baby when our oldest was just 13 months would be a challenge, trying to give them each attention and time would be impossible but no, those things aren't difficult it is simply the fact we don't sleep. 
So September 1st I decided that was it, we are transitioning from survival mode to living mode. We will no longer dwell on the fact we are beyond words exhausted and we don't see any sleeping improvements instead we will LIVE. We will take Trexen to swimming lessons, I will join a women's bible study (not just join but fully dive in), have friends over for dinner, plan and prepare 2 over the top birthday parties for my little ones, go on day trips, build a tractor bed (that one is Jeff's project), continue working full-time, bake cookies for the neighbors, participate in all things wedding for my sister, continue creating with Poplin and attend some craft shows this fall/winter, think about other people, serve other people, accept help without hesitation, continue weekly play dates, go on dates with my husband, call and email friends, send birthday and thinking of you cards, set my alarm, do my hair in the morning, run a few times each week and most of all enjoy life! I don't want to spend my time obsessing over how tired I am, short on patience missing all the wonders of the day.
Night number 1 came and... we took Pace to my mom's!!! Thank goodness for grandparents. We at least entered this new phase well rested. I for see this being a slow, steady transition but hey attitude is everything. Along with this I am working on being realistic, not everything I plan or would like to happen can. We do have 2 kids under the age of 2 and I love it, wouldn't trade it for the world. Survival mode was necessary and expected but we are looking ahead...
Are you surviving or living?
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